1. The Self-Care Check: Am I Taking Care of Myself as Intentionally as I Take Care of My Children?

 

Because:

You can’t pour from an empty cup. When you prioritize self-care, you maintain emotional stability and prevent burnout.

Taking care of yourself isn’t selfish — it’s essential. It ensures you’re not transferring stress or frustration to your children under the disguise of discipline.

 

2. The Values Check: Am I Living the Values I Want My Children to Embrace?

 

Because:

Our actions speak louder than our words.

Good behavior is often caught more than it is taught.

Children learn more from what you live than what you lecture.

 

For them, “Do as I do” will always be a stronger instruction than “Do as I say.”

3. The Awareness Check: Am I a Proactive, Reactive, or Nonchalant Mum?

 

A. The Proactive Mum

 

Definition:

She plans ahead, anticipates her children’s needs, and takes intentional steps to guide and nurture before problems arise.

She is emotionally aware, strategic, and purposeful in her parenting.

 

Her mantra: “I no dey loose guard.”

 

B. The Reactive Mum

 

Definition:

She responds only after things happen — driven more by emotion or stress than by strategy.

Her actions are spontaneous rather than intentional.

 

Her mantra: “For any gbàs, I get the right gbós for am.”

 

C. The Nonchalant Mum

 

Definition:

She’s detached, indifferent, or overly relaxed about her children’s needs and emotional well-being.

She shows little urgency or engagement in their growth or challenges.

 

Her mantra: “This life, I can’t kill myself o.”

 

4. The Accountability Check: How Do I Handle My Mistakes in Front of My Children?

 

Because:

Children learn conflict resolution and problem-solving from us — not by what we say, but by what we do.

Owning your mistakes teaches humility, accountability, and emotional maturity — powerful life lessons every child needs to see in action.

 

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5. The Emotional Regulation Check: How Do I Handle Stress, Anger, or Frustration Around My Children?

 

Because:

Your children won’t just treat themselves the way you treat them — they’ll treat themselves the way you treat yourself.

You unconsciously set the emotional standard in your home.

How you regulate your emotions teaches them how to regulate theirs. You are their emotional mirror.