As grown ups, we tend to want not to be questioned; after all, we are adults and can make our own decisions. We are not babies. We are free and mature.

But when in a relationship/marriage, learn to explain yourself. 

Explain yourself to your spouse when you come home late.

Explain yourself to your spouse when he/she tries calling you but your line is busy or your phone is off or you fail to pick up.

Explain yourself to your spouse when you take long to reply to his/her messages.

Explain yourself to your spouse when you make financial decisions.

Explain yourself to your spouse where you will be going with friends.

Explain yourself to your spouse when you fail to do as you promised.

Explain yourself to your spouse when you change your mind over an issue.

Explain yourself to your spouse when you make mistakes and why you made them.

Explain yourself to your spouse when about to make a career move.

Explain yourself to your spouse when you are struggling with a matter.

Explain yourself to your spouse about your health concerns.

You explain yourself not because you are being disrespected or belittled, but because you respect your spouse. You explain yourself because you are accountable to each other. The moment you two got married, you became one and accountable. Your spouse is your accountability partner. You are responsible for each other.

Too many relationships and marriages are suffering because the ones in them don't explain themselves. Freely explain yourself, don't even let your spouse ask you. That is how you build trust and make your spouse feel secure, thought of and respected.

And if you want your spouse to explain himself/herself to you, create an environment of love, respect and patience. Don't confront harshly or interrogate with a suspicious tone. Let your spouse feel he/she can tell you things without being rushed, judged or misunderstood.

Don't let your pride get in the way. Pride destroys team work. For both of you to submit to love, you need humility. The more information you give, the more trust grows. Where there is clarity, there is trust.

Stop acting like you are single. If you wanted not to be accountable to someone, you shouldn't have committed to someone.