How A Woman Should Go To Bed

1. A young married woman should never sleep in any cloth, not even in an underwear, she should always go to bed completely uncovered.
2. Any married woman of children-bearing age should never wear an underwear around her husband unless it is necessary.
3. Any woman who lives with a man, be it a lover or husband, should never sleep in an underwear on.
4. All women who have partners should only sleep in underwears if they're in their monthly periods.
5. You complain that your man doesn't touch you, and accuse him of losing interest in you, but you sleep in an underwear, or wear protective tights to bed, what do you want him to do?
6. As a woman, you MUST always shower before going to bed, we can't be smelling a mixture of used engine oil, sweats and farts at the garage, then come home to smell more.
7. If you feel horny as a woman, pushing your butt against him is not the way to communicate your desires, undress and climb him like Mwendee. Don't just face the wall thinking he no longer wants you because he didn't respond to your butt jerks.
8. Don't weaponize horizontal gymnastics, if you keep doing that, he will soon lose interests and visit the nearest brothel, or engineer your maid/friend/neighbour. Vagina is not a diplomatic tool for reconciliation or coercion.
9. Don't talk about your differences during horizontal gymnastics, that ruins the mood. Wait until the following day.
10. Lastly, have a bucket of cold water and a piece of cloth beside the bed, wipe yourself and wipe him, stay clean, don't stain the bedsheets. Also, cold water refreshes him and reduces the time he takes to erect again.
Remember, anything more than three shots per night is no longer enjoyment, that is maniacal and influenced by Satan.
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