Frank Mba You Are ‘On Your Own’ IGP Tells Force PRO.

January 14 16:49 2020

Going to a police place can reveal lots of fun especially if it is a relaxed programme. I sat with senior Police officers especially the older Commissioners of Police while the new ones were being decorated and it was laughter. Can I share my notes?

  1. No Blues for Officers. Serving Police officers could not come to dance as the Police Band dished out fine tunes. It was the Police Officer wives in flamboyant clothes that rocked the music. When I asked why, I was told because dancing in uniform could lead to an express way to the Guard Room. Chineke!
  2. Tion Sir! All the security men at the Peace Keeping House could not approach me to “invite me for questioning” because I was bold to look straight into their eyes and tell them “Keep moving” when they stand before me. I overheard two officers say I must have been a retired senior officer who came to do “espirit de corps”. I had a clean shave and a low “Gorimapa cut”. You get my point?
  3. Tear gas fear. There was this senior CP among the older CP’s who warned his colleague not to pull his legs. “Old boy, that’s the last warning or I will tear gas you now”. I checked my athletic distance to the nearest door.
  4. Frank Mba is O-Y-O. He as the MC had dereliction of duty. Yes that is a civil service word abi for negligence. He forgot to introduce the House of Representative Members there present. The IGP in his own speech said Mba was “ON YOUR OWN’’, if the House of Rep members were angry for that act. You know sirs that you may soon call me to your chambers, please forgive my PRO. I did not see the gavel hit the table but Mba gave a smart salute like an officer who saw his oga driving through the check point he is manning. Am still investigating how many pages of Apology Mba wrote to the House of Rep.
  5. Bad salute. The Police Officer in charge of training must hear this. In the Police Force, just like in other Military outfits, the spouse of an officer is a rank above the officer, so the spouses of the new CPs are AIGs. You salute well your senior officer. Before the nose of the IGP, the new CPs were giving ‘the oza room’ salute. IGP had to tell them repeat the salute as if they were on parade ground. I never liked parade ground salute because of some bad boys when I did my NYSC at the old Plateau State some decades ago. The 2IC would shout “Remove Head Dresses”. The bad boys from the back would say, “Remove all Dresses”. IGP has arrests to make on parade grounds o.
  6. FORMER NDLEA BOSS MOST VISITED. Of the three most classified personalities at the decoration ceremony, namely former Lagos State Governor, Brigadier General Buba Maruwa; former Head of Service, Ms Amma Pepple and former NDLEA boss, Chief Lanre Ipinwosho the most visited person is the Chief. The man kept standing and shaking hands even while the events were on. One of the officers said Buba Maruwa did not bring keke Maruwa. Let me come and go o. Why Keke Maruwa?
  7. Toll Gate for CP’s. CP Tunji Akingbola was so glad having junior CP’s that he went about grinning like a school boy. But the new CP’s did not come to “see their seniors” They were busy nacking foto. So CP Akingbola turned to another senior CP and said, “Officer, man that door and let these baby CPs declare themselves”. Excuse me CP Akingbola what does that mean? Declare themselves? Let me come and go before they tell me to declare myself o.
  8. Okediji for Police ke? While hosting CP Olusola Okediji to a reception, his school mates said his life was a surprise to them. Special Assistant to the President on Media, Kulikuli man, Femi Adesina et al wondered how Okediji could cope as a Police officer. He used to represent the Great Ife Police/Students Relations Committee giving them hard tackles in those days to the extent that it is either Okediji is there or no one else representing them. Even his classmate at Ibadan Christ Apostolic Grammar School, Rtd. Bola Koleoso said Okediji changed their views about their children joining the Police. My head kept rolling in the air. Were they afraid of “wetin you carry?” Please know that Police are your friends.
  9. Police are to protect you. Something happened that made me shift in my chair uncomfortably. A senior CP rose from his chair to go and salute his senior officer who I will introduce next. When he came back a guest sat on his chair right there in the midst of the senior CPs. The guest was told politely to vacate the chair. He said a big NO. He was told Police is meant to protect you and not to give you pleasure. Am still hanging at the IGP corridor to ask him about this. But somebody brought a notice: NO WAITING, KEEP MOVING.
  10. Man Mountain? There was this man mountain of a man I met. I searched my head for words to describe him. You know the Bible said there was no one as tall as Saul’s shoulder in Israel. The man has weight too. He sat on seat 001 beside the Announcers stand and every Officer saluted him. I used to say I was as tall as the Cocoa House in Ibadan but my heart skipped not a beat but several beats when I mistakenly stood beside him while I wanted to behold former Head of Service, Ms. Ama Pepple. (PASTOR!). I was dwarfed. The man is the Assistant Inspector General of Police, Moses Jitoboh. He is AIG Boarder Controls. See the attached pictures of me and AIG Jitoboh. Don’t ask what we discussed.
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